Re: HUMOR: Privatize the US military!
Wed, 17 Feb 1999 13:53:49 -0800

Still laughing like crazy...we can only hope that
this is but Part I!!! 

pat myers

Anitra Freeman wrote:
> I thought that the members of this list might enjoy this particular
> writing-workshop
> rant from our Real Change resident satirist, Dr. Wes Browning:
> [forward]
> Since there is such a good chance that the first US president of the
> new millennium is one of the announced e-candidates [several Writers had
> previously announced that they would run for President, with an email
> campaign only] on this very list,
> I would urge that you all take seriously my opposition to socialized
> defense as outlined below. Thank you.
> It really burns my buns that US taxpayers have to foot the bill for a
> military that then turns around and defends all Americans without
> regard for those who are really doing the paying.
> I mean, who says every citizen should be defended *equally* by means
> of high cost, high tech, military might?! It doesn't make sense. It's
> big government at its worst, taking and taking and taking from those
> who *work* *their* *butts* *off* to pay for those rifles and grenades
> and torpedoes and bombs and cruise missiles, not to mention the
> research and development that makes them possible, pay to train and
> house and feed those recruits, and pay for the doctors (*not cheap!*)
> to patch up those recruits when they have become wounded and transport
> them back to work on the front-lines. Why should deadbeats and widowed
> housewives and orphaned children reap the benefits of warfare?
> Obviously, that's a rhetorical question: they shouldn't!
> Therefore I propose that the US military, which really amounts to
> *socialized* defense, be totally privatized.
> Citizens should have the right to have their defense needs met by
> agents in their direct employ. Laws need to be passed allowing for the
> establishment of military corporations permitted to operate solely on
> behalf of their shareholders and subscribers, and those whom their
> subscribers explicitly name as beneficiaries, as provided by
> appropriate contractual agreements, and contingent upon strict
> adherence to a payment schedule. No deadbeats allowed!
> The free market works. It works when it comes to selling frisbees. It
> works in the jogging shoe business. It works when it comes to selling
> kidney transplants, getting quality hookers, and deciding where the
> Olympics should be held. Why then do people think that it can't work
> in defense? It can, it has (Panama, Colombia, Fourteenth Century
> Europe, Moldavia), and it may again, if we let it.
>         ----------------------------------------------------
>         (c) Dr. Wes Browning,
>         WARNING! >>>>>>>> POET AT WORK! >>>>>>>> WATCH HEAD!
>         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> [end forward]
> Write On!
> ___________________________________________________________
> Anitra L. Freeman, Dances With Dragons,
> See for a full list of
> websites and webrings, because if I list them all here you are going to be
> *so* mad at me...
> Check for current projects if
> you wonder what I'm up to lately