[Hpn] chance martin's holiday challenge

chance martin streetsheet@sf-homeless-coalition.org
Tue, 03 Dec 2002 18:16:15 -0800

Hello Beautiful People,

I turned 48 years old yesterday, and my sweetie is in Seattle at the
national Harm Reduction conference. Needless to say, it was a rather
lackluster event (my b-day, not the conference), so I thought that I might
try something *fun* to shake off these dusty and useless feelings of age.

Today, there were a couple of amusing emails circulating out here on the
west coast with alternate lyrics to traditional holiday carols.

So here's chance martin's holiday challenge: the carols from today's
messages are here, as well as the perpetrators.  Make up some of your own!
Add them to this thread! If nothing else, we might gather a good list of fun
songs to sing at holiday protests...



To the tune of Over the River and through the Woods

Over the river and through the woods
Away from the cops we run.
The police know the camps
They'll be targeting next
And We've run out of places to go-o.

Over the river and through the woods
We stay out of sight, you know.
The rangers will ticket us, then take our stuff
And the cops? Off to jail we go-o.

Over the river and through the woods
City Council's hats I spy.
They're pointed and black
And they'll give us no slack
'Cause developers bought them a pie.

Over the river and through the woods
We are residents just like you..
We're down on our luck
And we don't got a buck
But we have hopes and dreams do come true.

*   *   *   *   *

To the tune of Jingle Bells

Dashing through the woods
To escape from being caught.
How funny, if you have no home
That sleep's against the law.

Rental prices soar.
Shelter beds are rare.
Still, if you're caught asleep outside
You're bound to go to jail.

Salvation Army bells, donations swell
I still don't have a home.
Oh what peace, It'd be to sleep
In a jail free camping zone.

[No ill towards Salvation Army intended.  It just
seemed to fit well and that in spite of all the
efforts towards helping people experiencing
homelessness, some are still forced to sleep outside

Plagarized by Paula Lomazzi of the Sacramento Homeless Organizing Coalition

To which Becky Johnson of Homeless United for Friendship and Freedom (HUFF)
in Santa Cruz added:

Thanks Paula!  I thought I'd add one we sing every year, but update yearly
with the new mayor's name.
--- Becky Johnson

To the tune of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

God rest ye merry gentlemen
but not in Santa Cruz
Mayor Reilly has a sleeping ban
She'll cite you if you snooze
And if you're warm beneath your quilt
Your blankets you shall lose
Bad Tidings, not comfort or joy
--- comfort or joy
Bad Tidings, not comfort or joy

chance martin, editor
A Publication of the Coalition on Homelessness, San Francisco
468 Turk Street, San Francisco, CA  94102
415 / 346.3740-voice  415 / 775.5639-fax